Friday, September 23, 2011

Rough Day

All of you know that I am VERY independent.  I didn't get married until 38 and after nearly 3 years of marriage I'm still adjusting.

I RARELY cry in front of people - because I don't really like them to know when I'm hurt - I suppose I feel like they will know how to "get to me" next time if they want to.  Sad way of thinking isn't it?  I'm fairly tough, but I do have my limitations. 

My husband is my big weakness.

Jordan is in Okinowa, Japan for work right now.  He has been there since 09/01/11 and will not be home until after my surgery

That said - today he posted a picture of himself in Japan on the beach.  As crazy as it sounds, the image sent me over the edge.  A flood of tears came out while sitting in my office, and I had to shut the door. 

When we first met, he didn't travel at all.  We got into a grove and all was well.  He was promoted and started to travel -  short trips at first - but then a month to two months away at a time.  I've travelled for work ALOT in the past, but those days are gone for me.  I'm happy that Jordan is able to experience so much, but at times its really hard for him to be away.  Today I'm having the kind of "lost without you"  ache that you feel physically.

I miss my husband.   

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